Fighting Weight

I spent this last week getting my body ready for pain. I did 3 days of legs, 1.5 days of arms, 12 mile walk spread out through 5 days. It was supposed to be 6 days but again time management kicked my ass. This week I'm going to continue with the same leg exercises and walking regimen but I seriously need to get my arms working. In one week I've lost 1.6 Lbs, I know it doesn't sound like much but slow and steady is going to win this race. Only thing is...I can't believe tomorrow is May 1st! I still feel like its February. Where did the last 3 months go? Its all an ugly blur of bullshit!

As for my fighting weight...I'm completely excited to get back to it! I'm finally getting healthy for the right reasons. My back will not only stop hurting but my clothes will fit, I'll have more energy, and I'm pretty sure I'll smile more. I've been forcing a smile for so long, it hurts my face! Haha!

Wish me luck!

By the way, I did get a paycheck from my freelance work but I'm pretty sure they missed a day. It took over 5 weeks and that's fucking ridiculous.

Makeup and change

I spent my whole day today on makeupalley.com. Whew! I uploaded so many photos of products I have waiting to be swapped. As much as I loved the potential of what I can swap, I'm not liking the low ballers. Eh Hem! Ladies... stop trying to swap your cheap ass shit for my high end cosmetics.
Why on earth would I want to exchange my $59 blush for a $15 lip liner? Now I'm not saying that the product isn't any good but I think fair is fair. Why can't we exchange for equal value?

With that said...I'm on a new rampage. My Dad let me in on a few truths.

The truth is... I've gained 40lbs in the last 2 years. For many reasons that I don't feel like exploring it happened. For the last few months I've been trying to figure out what to do. Now 6 years ago I knew EXACTLY what to do. I was always in the gym doing cardio and lifting weights. Loved every minute of it. So why don't I do that again?...you ask. Well, like I said things have changed. I've had 2 back surgeries and lots of grief. Sometimes I cant even get out of bed. So how am I supposed to get up and move?
I've been procrastinating on making my plan so I guess I better get to it.  

Freelance Warning

As a professional makeup artist I have the opportunity to pick and choose what jobs to take. Sometimes I work as a freelance for any company that needs an extra hand for an event. Unfortunately when working for these companies you have to wait at least 3 weeks for a paycheck. Apparently 3 weeks is an ok amount of time to wait but as I look at my calender I realized that I've been waiting for 5 weeks. I'm sure eventually I'll get paid but this isn't acceptable.

What's the point of working as a freelance if you don't reap any rewards for what feels like too long?

My suggestion is to really think about what it is you want for yourself. Don't rely on your freelance pay to live make sure you have a plan B. When your in business for yourself it's probably best to have plans C - Z ready. You never know when you'll need that extra plan.

Eck!

I didn't think it was possible but I managed to take my financial situation as bad as it was...and made it so much worse.
My bank account is negative, service is about to get cut off, and I have no idea when my crappy pay check is coming.
Anyone would think that this situation would be the motivation I needed to get my ASS in CHECK! But once again...FEAR has taken OVER!!!
I'm such a pussy! I know the worse that can happen is nothing. Asking shouldn't be this difficult!
Why the fuck am I so scared? Is it hearing the word "NO"? Is it feeling rejected? Am I just tired of all the bullshit and wishy washy answers I get from what I thought were potential customers? How can I present the perfect package so that no one could say NO? Does such a package exist?

I feel like I've been racking my head trying to reinvent the wheel.

What to do....what to do...